Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Why I've been pretending to be a night owl

I have always thought that I was a night owl.  I always stayed up late doing homework, I always worked the closing shift.  I stayed up late on the weekends with friends.  I stayed up late finishing projects that had to be done before the next day.  I hated waking up and getting out of bed. I would avoid early things at all costs.  I thought I did all of this because I was a night owl, but what if the opposite is true.  Consider this: Perhaps I was a night owl because I stayed up late all of those long nights.  What if I have simply been training myself to become a night owl.  What if my longing to become a morning person was really a fact that I lost somewhere along the way. 

I have recently been investigating the symptoms of both night owl and morning lark and it I think that it boils down to two things in deciding your classification:
1. You do your most productive work during preferred times (ie: night owl-at night, morning person-in the morning) when your brain is ‘awake’.
2. Your preferred time of day is calming to you.
If would respond to these as saying 1. My brain is most ‘awake’ probably between 8 and 10AM as well as right before I got to bed (11PM), when I can’t sleep because I have so many things to put on my list of things to do the next day.  I would also say that 2. the irregular early mornings I’ve had, were some of my favorite days.  I love sunrises and once in a while during the summer I would have to work the opening shift and be to work at 4:45AM, the ideal time to see the entire progression of a perfectly calming sunrise. 

If I were to objectively read those responses, I would say I’m a morning person.  Here are some other symptoms that prove that I was definitely not meant to be a night owl:

First and foremost, I am afraid of the dark.  The dark is scary, not calming.

I love sunrises, and the sun in general. 

I love breakfast.

I have always wanted to have my room on the East side of the house so that I can see the sun in the morning when I wake up.

I dislike sleep and feel like it is a waste of time.
And you know what, I’m quite sure that I’m not the only one fooled by high school homework or college roommate shenanigans. 

Some study has shown that only about 20% of the general population (source: see some obscure study done somewhere) are correctly classified into a morning or a night person grouping.  Some of these people truly do function best at 2AM.  The same pattern is seen in animals who hunt at night; their eyes were made to see better, their senses are heightened at night.  This makes sense to me; but what about those that don’t have a heightened sense at night or morning? What about those people who can’t get out of bed in the morning or who fall asleep watching movie at night? Maybe they are really three types of people: enter the ‘daytime people’.  What about the other 80% of the population who seems to fit somewhere in the middle? These people function best on a 9-5 schedule.  Maybe that’s why it’s so common. I think that society is forcing people to be classified as night owls or morning people when they aren’t really. 

In all of the research I did for this (re: Googled two things “how a night owl becomes a morning person” and “how a morning person becomes a night owl”)  I was surprised that there were infinitely less morning people trying to become night owls than night owls becoming morning people.  Makes me think that most people are really daytime people who think they are night owls and feel like they should be morning people.

So maybe I’m a daytime person.  But I think I was meant to be a morning person. 

Friday, February 18, 2011

"I'm thinking about becoming a morning person"

This is it. I'm growing up and I want to be a morning person. I want to be one of those people who get up early, motivated for the day, who get things done before they go to work and are happy to do so. What am I thinking!? I don't know why, I just want to so bad, I love the idea of getting a work out in before alot of people are awake, I love sunrises, and the idea of morning having so many possibilities. Mornings just seem to be great always, no matter how the rest of your day goes, the morning is always a mystical time (sometimes with real mist). Maybe its a Colorado thing, but the mornings there are always so calm, no matter what the rest of the day will be like, you can count on the morning being the same shade of light pink with the clouds drifting perfectly across the sky. I want to see that everyday. I want to be a morning person. There's only one problem: I'm a night owl. I stay up late, I always have. The night is when my mind works it's magic. I stay up late pondering the essential facts of life: how to clean my room, when to do my laundry, deciding if I'll be on time for work, what to do to finish my projects, you name it.. I will think about it all right before I go to bed and forget it as soon as I fall asleep.

So there's the dilemma. I love the mornings, but I do everything at night. So how do you BECOME a morning person? Is there a 3 or 4 step process that I am not aware of? Or is it something that you can just jump into, both feet first: wake up early. Is that it? I have an inkling it's not. I feel like there needs to be some type of self-help seminar. Do I need to mentally prepare to live in the morning? How is it possible? I will work on some type of strategy for these things and report back.

I'll see you in the morning!

Monday, August 23, 2010

I've been skydiving for the past 4 years.

Since coming to Idaho my life has seemed to become so simple. I enjoy every sunset. I read books. I eat food. I spend time with people (not as much as I should). I walk around the greenbelt. I have time to sit still. I can do nothing if I want. And for the first time since... who knows how long..I haven't worried about anything. I can honestly say I have no stress. And it is WONDERFUL!

I feel like my life is a skydiving trip:
Going through school was the ride up 13,000 feet. When I first took off, I didn't really think that the plane ride would ever end, that maybe I would be ready to jump out of the plane while going up, eventually. The closer I got to the actual drop, the more nervous I started to feel. The anticipation of graduation was exciting and terrifying. School is easy, there is a goal and you know it's going to end, someday. That day came. I jumped out of the plane with my parachute whether I was ready or not. I knew that once I got on that plane, I would have to jump out but I don't think I ever expected it to come so fast. The first few seconds of free falling was horrible. I went from sitting still, comfortable, to feeling sick, my stomach in my throat, I felt sure I was going to throw-up right then and there. I almost couldn't handle such a big change in scenery, in surroundings, in atmosphere, in life. It only took a few seconds to get used to it. I still get motion sickness sometimes (especially lately..I think it has something to do with the concussion I got a few weeks ago) when I think about having to land somewhere. But when I live in the exact second, not looking ahead or behind, nothing can take the calming feeling away from me. I'm just enjoying the ride. I know that I have to land somewhere eventually, but I'd rather live in a naive, blissful state while I can because I know that there won’t ever be another time in my life exactly like right now. I'm going to enjoy every second I can, suspended in the middle of what I've always known and what's going to surprise me no matter what happens.

You know what; I'm ready for anything that life has to throw at me. I've always said that I can be happy anywhere. I'm happy in Idaho right now. I'm happy when I go to work. I'm happy when I go home and play. I'm happy when I go to Salt Lake and visit friends and family. I'm happy when I go back to Southern Utah to see friends and family. I'm happy because I can be, because I choose to be. I don't know what my Heavenly Father has planned for me but I'm confident that it's the best plan. Whatever he decides to give me, I'll take it, and I’ll run with it. And I'll be happy. I hope I have faith enough to live up to his expectations.

I feel like the song "The Show" by Lenka

Thursday, May 27, 2010

The light at the end of the tunnel isn't so promising

I have seen the light at the end of the tunnel and when I came out, there must have been a solar eclipse because there's not too much light coming my way. but you know what, I did it. I graduated. My school career is over for now and I can move on to bigger and better things.

These things include:
Becoming a working woman-- I sent out probably 80 applications and I got 1 response, I guess one is all you need because I got a job at Idaho National Lab. This would be wonderful if I had something to do at work other than reading articles for 6 hours a day and the other 3 hours counting the ceiling tiles, listening to this one guy laugh like he's coming to get me, and making friends with the robot mail cart. I'm hoping that they will actually start the supposed 'project' that I'm working on so I can actually have something to do.

Making new friends-- This one is hard because I hate small talk and I have the exact same conversation with every single person I meet 15 TIMES A DAY. It goes something like this:
"Hi, I'm _______, what's your name?"
"Hey, I'm Sharna?"
"...?? Shaa?"
"OOH OK! (i.e.: I still have no idea what your name is)" "Soo where are you from?"
"I'm from Denver(ish)." "What about you?"
"I'm from _______ (some town in Idaho that no one has ever heard of)."

"Great, so what are you doing in Idaho Falls?"
"I have an internship at Idaho National Lab this summer."
"Wow, so what are you doing for your internship?"
"I'm working on synthetic biofuels, ::glazed over looks incur:: The project I'm working on basically takes biomass like wood or any organic material and creates a more condensed version that is can be used for fuel just like coal. (Sorry, you asked)"
"That sounds really interesting (No it doesn't)" "So what are you studying to do something like that."
"I just graduated from SUU, in Cedar City, with an Integrated Engineering degree."
I try to condense as much information as possible so that it's harder for people to ask these questions, so I can talk about anything but this. It's like a little game I play.
"What is Integrated Engineering?"
And on it goes, one horribly identical conversation after the other, talking to people I don’t know, about things they don’t care about and won’t remember even if they did."
That's why I hate meeting new people. It's always the same. I would rather find out who people are, and not just what they do.

Playing the ukulele-- yeah, so what if I’m the trendy kind, I like it. The best part is that I didn’t have to buy one yet (I know Nick would kill me if I tried to steal his little baby). So I can pretend to play and when I feel accomplished enough that I could justify a purchase of such a precious instrument I will gladly do so. Until then, I'll rival in free things.

Wearing a Jean Jacket-- I recently purchased a favorite gem from DI last week and have worn it just about every day since then. I think it's a wise purchase, I feel like a jean jacket says, "I’m kind of cold, but I don’t need a REAL jacket, just a light one will do," as well as, "I know the 90's were horrible and painful but let’s face it, the jean jacket is the only good thing that came out alive." The only thing that is one of my pet peeves is when people wear jeans with a jean jacket (and I'm the one who keeps doing it!) So, as long as I can keep my own rule, I still say, good buy.

FINALLY reading Atlas Shrugged-- Jona and I started reading it last summer. I got to page 40, which felt like page 122 because it was exceptionally boring, and I have since started reading again from the beginning since I love torturing myself I figured it couldn't hurt to read it again. I am now at the same place I left off; it only took me 1 day this time compared to the month it took last summer to get to the same spot. I better not be disappointed this time.

Sister time!-- Since moving to Idaho Falls, I have definitely taken advantage of my sisters being 20 minutes away and I think that has been my favorite thing so far. I never get to see them so it's awesome being so close!

Monday, April 5, 2010

With procrastination, nothing comes fast enough

Yeah, so what if I haven't written on this blog in like...uh..a year. I actually really do have really funny things to say that everyone is dying to read and will appreciate. AND, I'm doing better than Allicat on blog posting but shes on a misson soo there's that. small accomplishments.
Well, this whole school experience is quickly coming to a close, just not soon enough. I've tried to stay motivated but its actually really hard to go to class when your taking a senior design class that never meets, two other classes I have zero interest in attending
and two freshman classes that are a complete waste of time. I'm actually really glad I waited to take them until my last semester because I have more motivation knowing that if I don't pass them I would feel completely worthless. Good goal to keep an eye on: Don't end up becoming completely worthless by having to retake freshman classes after 'graduation'. I can count writing a blog 'writing my paper' for English 2010, right? yes. and you know what, it doesn't ever make graduation come any faster.

Thursday, July 2, 2009


Jona has discovered an alternate reality of fake things in life, specifically fake FAVORITE things. This realization was brought about by fake favorite movies and has since been expanded to and fake favorite memories, numbers, shortcuts, jobs, I don’t know...pretty much anything.

Fake Favorite Movies:
Many of you (I’m so optimistic on the number of people that actually read this) are wondering what the purpose of a fake favorite movie is. Let me explain: Perhaps you have been asked "what's your favorite movie?" and have no answer. That’s where the fake favorites join the scene. Now you automatically have an answer when you are asked AND have an opportunity to be funny and witty, which is always a bonus when you're itching for some street cred.

For those of you unversed in fake favorite movies, there are a few stipulations that must be met in order for a movie to qualify as a fake favorite movie.
1. It must be a movie you like, alot. With potential to actually be your favorite movie- leaving some doubt in their mind as to whether it really is your favorite movie or not.
2. It must be slightly embarrassing to tell people that it is your favorite movie.
3. It should be an older movie that is fairly unknown and if possible, under appreciated.
4. It cannot be a real favorite movie e.g. Gladiator, 6th sense...
5. It cannot be a Disney movie.

Fake Favorite Memories:
There is a large possibility that this one only applies to me. It would go in the category of things that you think are real, but alas, are not. OR maybe if you really want something to happen but it never has. That would also qualify as a fake favorite memory.

Fake Favorite Job:
Seeing as I don’t have and actual job, I must invent a fake job. I’m still working on this one cause I want to make it really good.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

my fake reality

I have a terrible problem with distinguishing my dreams from reality. I have always had this issue it's just never been brought to the forefront of my attention until my roommates started pointing out that about half of my stories end with, "hmm, maybe that was a dream." I think it started when I was telling them about the creepy neighbors that lived down the street from us in Wisconsin and how their house always looked dark and the one time I was riding my bike when one of them started chasing me so I rode as fast as I could up the hill to our house, threw my bike on the lawn and went inside and locked the door. I still to this day, am unsure whether or not it’s true or not. So that one could be vetoed. There is countless other evidence from my childhood:

I did all my chores the best and was rewarded with going on a daddy-daughter date; we headed over to the new mall that had recently been finished to eat dinner. We went inside and I saw a GIANT ROLLER COASTER inside the mall!! I knew I had to ride it; and dad said we could do whatever I wanted that night so I knew it was in the bag! I wanted to go even before we ate dinner, but dad said we had to eat before we could go one the roller coaster.

I was genuinely excited when relaying this story back to my roommates. My roommates looked at me quizzically and I began to doubt. My dreams were shattered. I realized that the new mall was actually Park Meadows and I'm pretty sure that the roller coaster would still be there today if they had put it in when they first built it and I think it is now a food court. It’s really disappointing just to see my childhood memories crushed like a leaf... it makes me wonder what else wasn't real from what I remember of my childhood.

Now that I am getting better at remembering my dreams this happens a lot more often now:

I was exploring all the things that Cedar City has to offer upon which includes Jolley's Ranchwear my roommates came with me and we were playing and trying on hats and cowgirl boots in various colors and styles. We were the only ones in the store because I assume that they receive limited business in save the VIP customers so they were glaring at us but they never said anything. We eventually left without buying anything and we were completely satisfied.

So I really was in Jolley's Ranchwear yesterday, I had to drop off a few of the paint the town red card things...and as soon as I stepped in the door I had déjà vu. I stopped and stood there for a second trying to analyze whether I had actually been there before and the scene above played in my head. It was then that I had an inkling that maybe I really hadn’t gone into Jolley's Ranchwear with my roommates and that had ALSO been a dream. I got home and asked Emily if she ever came with me to Jolley's Ranchwear. She looked at me again, as she always does when I propose one of my dreams to her, and I bent my head in shame--not again, not again.

If I've told you a story and you think it's really a dream, you should post it on here cause I want to make a list of all of them.