Thursday, February 12, 2009

Remain Bless Mobolaji

I received an email today, and i have about 346 junk mail emails DAILY and I usually just glance at them long enough to know that I never want to see it again and delete it shortly after that. But for some reason, this one caught my eye and I don't know why (hehe):
Dear Sir

I contact you because I need a responsible and humble person who I can make business with.pls your assistance is very important to me because i have a good huge amount of money to start my life over there.

i will like to invest this money in abroad but will like to sit down with you one on one to discuss it before we go further.

so that we can both understand the kind of person i am..because i realised that different things are going on internet.that is why i will like to sit with you to discuss the issue with you.

Mobolaji Festus
Thanks and remain bless.

There are SO many things wrong with this little ‘plea (SCAM) letter’ First of all: Sir—come on Moboloaji! I can accept that most people cant remember my name but they can usually remember my gender. Also, the amount of grammer mistakes can only lead me to believe that I should never contact nor waste my time to even finish reading this letter. But I didn’t so it continues. Here’s my favorite part: the third paragraph is pretty much priceless and gets better with every word. So we can both understand the kind of person I am.. what could someone be thinking, ‘oh yeah, he sounds like a nice guy I should give my money to invest “abroad.”’ Or perhaps you could be thinking, ‘You’ve got to be joking me Mobolaji, there is no way that I would help you invest, or MEET with you to find out that you are in fact, a creeper.’ Yeah, remain bless.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Wink Weakness

I obviously am human, and therefore have many weaknesses. One that has become most prevalent in recent days is my winking weakness. I wasn’t aware of my inability to wink until I found Emily. She is one of the best winkers I have ever met. Her wink is just subtle enough that you don't really know what hit you. you just feel this flustered feeling inside that makes you so happy that you feel like you have just been attacked with sunshine dust! Her wink makes you do a double take because you’re not really sure if it was meant for you; it makes you want her to do it again-and truth be told, she would do it again if you asked her but you couldn’t just flat out ask her to wink at you again, are you even allowed to do that? -- wish someone to just throw out their exquisite talent to the wind, I think not! Would it really be as precious as the first time? But you almost missed that wink so you definitely want to see it again. And again, and again. She really is THAT good. It happens like that every time.

Perhaps my winking weakness is more of a self conscious feeling since I now see what a wink is supposed to look like and I obviously do not match up to her level, I don't think I will ever be able to get to that level either.
I have a very cheesy wink, you know that Lindsay Lohan wink: yep, that's me. I know right, and no matter how serious I try to be it always ends up looking cheesy. I can’t wink without opening my mouth just like Lindsay, with my cheek moving up to close one eye rather than my top eyelid just closing. What's even sadder is that I really do have to concentrate to do it too, because if I don't, I end up just blinking or squinting and feeling even more retarded than I would have if I actually tried.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Gas Price Perspective

People always complain about gas prices going up, fortunately they are low right now but they wont stay that way forever. It is one of the few things that we actually notice when the price goes up. Obviously the effect of other items goes up as well with inflation and all of that but it is much less noticeable. If you think about it though, gas really isn't that expensive. I mean how many people buy a Starbucks everyday for what, $4 or a 20 oz drink for a dollar even if you buy a 2 liter, you might get it for a dollar. But gas is still cheaper than that, lets be optimistic: if you bought a 20 oz soda for $1, that would be an average of $2.25 a gallon. How far does that really get you though? Maybe a few hours before its flat or warm, but $2.50 for a gallon of gas....that gets me 30 miles it could last me like a WEEK (only in Cedar City, but that's beside the point). The possibilities are endless within a 30 mile radius! I still get a way better deal buying a gallon of gas than I do spending that money on a soda. So next time you buy complain about gas prices, then go buy a soda, think of the consequences that soda REALLY has on your budget.